nursery rhymes for adults

Category: Joke Board

Post 1 by Blue Velvet (I've got the platinum golden silver bronze poster award.) on Wednesday, 28-Sep-2005 13:52:36

Jack and Jill went up the hill
To have a little fun
Stupid Jill forgot the pill
And now they have a son

Mary had a little lamb
Her father shot it dead
Now it goes to school with her
between two hunks of bread

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
All the kings' horses,
And all the kings' men,
Had scrambled eggs
for breakfast again.

Hey diddle, diddle the cat took a piddle
All over the bedside clock.
The little dog laughed to see such fun,
Then died of electric shock.

There was a little girl who had a little curl
Right in the middle of her forehead.
When she was good, she was very, very good.
But when she was bad....
She got a fur coat, jewels, a waterfront condo and a sports car!

Post 2 by laced-unlaced (Account disabled) on Wednesday, 28-Sep-2005 15:19:36

hahahahaha! i love a laugh

Post 3 by PorkInCider (Wind assisted.) on Wednesday, 28-Sep-2005 20:18:01

Mary had a little lamb, she tied it to a pylon, 10000 volts went up it's arse, and turned it's wool to nylon.

Post 4 by Louise (Veteran Zoner) on Thursday, 29-Sep-2005 19:54:30

Humpty dumpty fucked a fat hoar, humpty dumpty spunked on the floor, and all the king's horses, and all the king's men, bent the bitch over and fucked her again! Mary had a little lamb, its wool was black as coal, but when it jumped over a fence, you saw its pink arsehole! Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack could lick Jill's fanny, but poor Jack's gob was filled with knob, cuz Jill's a fuckin tranny!

Post 5 by Damia (I'm oppinionated deal with it.) on Thursday, 29-Sep-2005 20:14:42

R u fucking are u fucking brother john? brother John? because my cunt hurts now because my cunt hurts now. and I've got aids. I've got aids. Hey Diddle Diddle the fag and the pillow the cow fucked under the moon. The little dog laughed. because the cow was blind and thought it a bowl.

Post 6 by rdfreak (THE ONE AND ONLY TRUE-BLUE KANGA-KICKIN AUSIE) on Saturday, 01-Oct-2005 9:29:10

I'm in the army now, I learnt to milk a cow, the cow let off and I took off. I'm in the airforce now!

Fat and skinny went to war. fat got shot with an apple core.

Fat and skinny climbed a tree, fat fell down in the labatory. Skinny went down and pulled the chain and fat was never seen again.

Fat and skinny were in the bath. fat blew off and made Skinny laugh.

Fat and skinny were in bed. fat rolled over and skinny was dead.

Post 7 by HauntedReverie (doing the bad mango) on Friday, 07-Oct-2005 21:33:24

haha that was funny, all of it. I have no jokes, I suck like that lol